I feel stupid sometimes... a lot.
Sep. 10th, 2014 08:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
demakatThe guy I work with said something that seems to be sticking with me. In school he was known for putting in the most work? He said it was because he wasn't naturally good at it. It being design in this case.
I went into graphic design because that's where I thought I could get a job and also be creative. It was easy for me to do graphic design and in reality I was fairly lazy in school.
I'm disappointed in myself. Maybe not so much for listening to people at a time when I didn't know what I wanted (and still don't) but also for not perusing something. I drew. I just happened to understand the principles of design before I knew what that was.
But now. I don't usually draw. I do things that don't feel like art, even though I guess it could be.
---
I've also been disappointed that I seem to spout off more aggressive opinions than I feel I did when I was younger. I seem to say things out loud that are fleeting, yet those are the words that people learn to associate with me.
---
I want to go to bed soon, but it's only 9. I wondering if this year I need to get a light to sit by, or if it's just because I'm torturing myself by writing down things I'd want in a partner. Like being gentle and soft. Fall makes me feel lonely because it's cuddling season, which is the ideal time to know someone soft and gentle.
Really I should just stop making internet flails and go make lunch for tomorrow.
I went into graphic design because that's where I thought I could get a job and also be creative. It was easy for me to do graphic design and in reality I was fairly lazy in school.
I'm disappointed in myself. Maybe not so much for listening to people at a time when I didn't know what I wanted (and still don't) but also for not perusing something. I drew. I just happened to understand the principles of design before I knew what that was.
But now. I don't usually draw. I do things that don't feel like art, even though I guess it could be.
---
I've also been disappointed that I seem to spout off more aggressive opinions than I feel I did when I was younger. I seem to say things out loud that are fleeting, yet those are the words that people learn to associate with me.
---
I want to go to bed soon, but it's only 9. I wondering if this year I need to get a light to sit by, or if it's just because I'm torturing myself by writing down things I'd want in a partner. Like being gentle and soft. Fall makes me feel lonely because it's cuddling season, which is the ideal time to know someone soft and gentle.
Really I should just stop making internet flails and go make lunch for tomorrow.
