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Nov. 8th, 2013 07:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
demakatposts!
posts when I don't feel like hell!
One of my friend's tells me that no of course I get split ends in my hair I just cut it too often to see. I haven't cut my hair in months, no split ends. I'm going to blame shampoop.
In case anyone was wondering why I don't make words here about regular non-emo life it's because of the above.
Started looking up snow pants, but most of all I need a new coat. I don't really trust coats. The material, especially for women's coats seems so flimsy. Like one good snag and the whole thing looks like hell. In the mean time I've been using my hoodie...which isn't going to work when it gets in the 20s.
Been making a friend. It's weird making new friends as an adult. It only usually works for me when the other person really wants to talk and hang out with me at first.
I made her some knitted hand warmers for her birthday and she gave me a thank you card for them already. It was a blank card where she basically said she is so glad I'm a part of her life and she believes that people are put into our lives for a reason.
I don't know that I ever really believe anything. I must believe some things. I do like the idea of people being able to teach me things however. The thing I can learn from this friend is the ability to actively express my feelings. I emo-coaster all over this journal, but I don't actually tell the people around me anything I feel between me and them. She has had all sorts of conversations with people about their relationships, but she is also likely the person to bring it up.
It reminds me of all the feelings I have about and for people. Gratitude, and love, etc. that I don't really express. I like when talking to someone gives me this amazing sense of ease and home. I use to think of it as safety, but now it's more a sense of wholeness. Like a hug. I never say anything though, so I don't know what anyone else is feeling unless they say. There is a tendency towards my knowing people who just don't say. It certainly takes much longer to form a bond over social dancing around without talking about things.
On the flip side, there are some people I don't know if I want that sort of connection with. That I might be sad that the strength is all on my side of things.
How many things I do to avoid hurting.
---
you are a bastard pandora! I thought I was going to get through this day without crying and then sweet child o' mine by scott davis.
posts when I don't feel like hell!
One of my friend's tells me that no of course I get split ends in my hair I just cut it too often to see. I haven't cut my hair in months, no split ends. I'm going to blame shampoop.
In case anyone was wondering why I don't make words here about regular non-emo life it's because of the above.
Started looking up snow pants, but most of all I need a new coat. I don't really trust coats. The material, especially for women's coats seems so flimsy. Like one good snag and the whole thing looks like hell. In the mean time I've been using my hoodie...which isn't going to work when it gets in the 20s.
Been making a friend. It's weird making new friends as an adult. It only usually works for me when the other person really wants to talk and hang out with me at first.
I made her some knitted hand warmers for her birthday and she gave me a thank you card for them already. It was a blank card where she basically said she is so glad I'm a part of her life and she believes that people are put into our lives for a reason.
I don't know that I ever really believe anything. I must believe some things. I do like the idea of people being able to teach me things however. The thing I can learn from this friend is the ability to actively express my feelings. I emo-coaster all over this journal, but I don't actually tell the people around me anything I feel between me and them. She has had all sorts of conversations with people about their relationships, but she is also likely the person to bring it up.
It reminds me of all the feelings I have about and for people. Gratitude, and love, etc. that I don't really express. I like when talking to someone gives me this amazing sense of ease and home. I use to think of it as safety, but now it's more a sense of wholeness. Like a hug. I never say anything though, so I don't know what anyone else is feeling unless they say. There is a tendency towards my knowing people who just don't say. It certainly takes much longer to form a bond over social dancing around without talking about things.
On the flip side, there are some people I don't know if I want that sort of connection with. That I might be sad that the strength is all on my side of things.
How many things I do to avoid hurting.
---
you are a bastard pandora! I thought I was going to get through this day without crying and then sweet child o' mine by scott davis.
