I smell like metal
Nov. 6th, 2013 09:43 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
demakatMy sewing machine was declared non-functioning when my mom tried to use it at one of her classes. Because she needed two, cause there were just too many people for her to have just one. Mine worked fine when I last used it (this all happened months ago now).
My sister has an interview tomorrow and she needs her pants hemmed. She asked my mom to do it. My mom who has quit doing anything she can reasonably pawn off on someone else, suggested that my sister ask ME to sew them because I have a sewing machine (so does she).
But it's broken. because my mom broke it.
I am too tired for this shit. I feel like I'm giving myself all away and I'm getting nothing at all in return for it. I'm surrounded by people who are energetic and want to laugh at things. But I feel sad and I want someone to cuddle with me. I keep trying to fix it by myself and nothing is working. It's like I'm being entertaining all the time and I need some serious down time, and these other people don't.
That's probably exactly it. I want to hang out with new friends, I want to hang out with old friends, but I also NEED to spend time by myself. Even my room is exhausting.
I haven't started any of my new projects and I don't want to clean. I don't want to go through any of this stuff, but I'm not ready to just get rid of everything yet. Not even my probably completely broken sewing machine.
---
I want to be watching non-stupid tv with someone on a couch. I want it to be warm or like blankets or some shit and I want a project like this stupid hemming thing. Just something to focus on that isn't the tv. Then when ever we sort of decide it's time for bed, to go to sleep.
I just want simple things. Instead I feel cold and sad and I still have to hem these pants. Plus it's already 10:15 at night.
My sister has an interview tomorrow and she needs her pants hemmed. She asked my mom to do it. My mom who has quit doing anything she can reasonably pawn off on someone else, suggested that my sister ask ME to sew them because I have a sewing machine (so does she).
But it's broken. because my mom broke it.
I am too tired for this shit. I feel like I'm giving myself all away and I'm getting nothing at all in return for it. I'm surrounded by people who are energetic and want to laugh at things. But I feel sad and I want someone to cuddle with me. I keep trying to fix it by myself and nothing is working. It's like I'm being entertaining all the time and I need some serious down time, and these other people don't.
That's probably exactly it. I want to hang out with new friends, I want to hang out with old friends, but I also NEED to spend time by myself. Even my room is exhausting.
I haven't started any of my new projects and I don't want to clean. I don't want to go through any of this stuff, but I'm not ready to just get rid of everything yet. Not even my probably completely broken sewing machine.
---
I want to be watching non-stupid tv with someone on a couch. I want it to be warm or like blankets or some shit and I want a project like this stupid hemming thing. Just something to focus on that isn't the tv. Then when ever we sort of decide it's time for bed, to go to sleep.
I just want simple things. Instead I feel cold and sad and I still have to hem these pants. Plus it's already 10:15 at night.
