I did things today!
Dec. 8th, 2018 07:39 pmSomeone on twitter was talking about their secret twitter for mutuals and my brain made sad puddle noises, I'm not a mutual. Then per-usual I considered the many facets that term encompasses and how I've seen it used. My sad puddle self does not care. Ideally I should have logged on to do guild run stuff in Guildwars 2, but I still feel disconnected with people from there, and spent the past week not playing and dealing with holiday card business.
I've been thinking a lot about how much I don't touch people. How hugging someone is so rare for me, that if I do actually want to hug them and stars align or something and I do get that awesome hug, I feel emotionally fucked-up for a good week afterwards. And really is that all I want? I have no idea. It is probably late winter issues. It's just frustrating that I can't really do anything about it. I can socialize with people, but it doesn't really make it better. I have no one to force the entire season of this British gardening show on, while I knit things and we plan our own garden together even though probably apartment living.
Onward to tea and knitting!!!
I've been thinking a lot about how much I don't touch people. How hugging someone is so rare for me, that if I do actually want to hug them and stars align or something and I do get that awesome hug, I feel emotionally fucked-up for a good week afterwards. And really is that all I want? I have no idea. It is probably late winter issues. It's just frustrating that I can't really do anything about it. I can socialize with people, but it doesn't really make it better. I have no one to force the entire season of this British gardening show on, while I knit things and we plan our own garden together even though probably apartment living.
( The things I did today that aren't whining about being alone )
Onward to tea and knitting!!!